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Posted: October 5th, 2019

Justin Kim

Justin KimMs. AlontoENG4U0 – B10 July 2018The Effects of Lying on Social RelationsSociety views lying with a negative stigma. This view is justified, as when one lies, it is with the intent to deceive, and hides the truth. Noone wants to be lied to, especially when it is about an important matter, even if the liar believes it is for the best. When one lies about something with great significance, it will inevitably lead to poor social relationships. When people lie, it can be to improve the image others have have of them.

However, when a liar is exposed, it creates a bad image for them. Having this negative image of them, people will start to avoid the individual, causing them to become isolated. Furthermore, their friends may start to lose trust in them as well, suspecting what their friend told them could be a lie. If this situation occurs, the individual may try lying to subdue the problem, which could cause further doubt about them.

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When pushed back into this scenario, even if they apologize, and tell the truth of the matter, the wedge between them has been created, and the doubt will always remain lingering. People will remember this incident, and avoid them, causing the person to have difficulty making new friends, and may even lose some of their current ones. With nobody to confide in, they can start to bottle up their emotions, which can make them more irritable.

Lying can also become mentally draining. Studies show that lying is more cognitively demanding than simply telling the truth, (Polage). While it is easier to prepare a lie ahead of time, it is more difficult to create a convincing lie without preparation. A liar must concentrate on creating a lie that doesn’t contradict with any of the known facts, or their own lie in order for their lie to remain undetected. When someone tells a lie, they become compelled to remember it as they told it, in case they need to repeat it, (Polage). This can drain a person mentally, because they must keep it in mind at all times in public, lest they want to admit they were lying and suffer consequences. If the liar feels guilty about lying, they will feel more stressed, out of fear of being exposed.

This stress, combined with the mental strain they are under, and the possibility of having pent up emotions, they can lead to becoming depressed. When depressed, it becomes difficult to interact with others, since they will feel down and gloomy. Lastly, lying isn’t something that is only done once. When someone lies, they will do it more and more often, until it becomes something that happens on a daily basis. A study showed that on average, an American citizen lied around once or twice a day, (Borreli). Furthermore, when questioned about their previous lies, they will have to make up a new one to answer. This creates more opportunities for them to make a mistake, and get caught.

Another study showed that when humans lie, the amygdala responds by creating a negative feeling, leading to feelings of guilt. However, as people lie more and more, the amygdala eventually stops, desensitizing them to their lies, (Borreli). This causes people to lie more often, because they feel less guilty about doing it. When they don’t get caught, that also increases the likelihood of them telling another lie, as they will believe that they can get away with it without being caught. The higher the frequency that one lies, the more opportunities there are for them to be caught.People will lie in hopes of improving their social status or to others opinions of them. Instead, lying will cause people to become more irritable, and depressed, as well as constantly lie to others.

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It is these factors that will lead to having poor social relationships. Rather than becoming the ideal person they want to become, in other’s eyes, they will be seen as a all around bad person. Alternatively, one should focus on becoming more honest, and earn others trust through effort, rather than trying to take a shortcut and lying.

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