Dear Diary,
There are so many thoughts spinning in my head right now that I hardly know where to start. I have so much to talk about, but all the ups and downs of the past two weeks have left my mind with this sort of buzzing sound. Its like everything is sparkling and glowing, and Im just there in the middle, taking it all in.
Ill start with the Chicken Girls. I had a lot to be thankful for this Thanksgiving when we all had dinner together at Rooney and Quinns house.
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Thats right, I mean all of us! Ellie (yes, ELLIE!) is back from the land of the Bs, Kayla broke up with Flash so shes ready to exist again, and the Forrester sisters are back on speaking terms with each other. Seeing everyone there all together (and Mr. Forrester in his ridiculous turkey hat) made me feel like I was in the middle of an incredible dream.
Seriously, I had to pinch myself once or twice, just to make sure it was all really happening.
Somehow, in the midst of all that holiday magic, my dream world continued into the Attaway High School premiere of Rodeo and Juliet. And, guess what – Angie tanked. I had so many nightmares about messing up and forgetting my lines, but it happened to her, the high school theater pro! I feel a little bad for her, but after she was so mean to me, I cant help but think she kind of deserved it. At least I could help her out, which brings me to my biggest surprise of the day
I PLAYED JULIET! Well, for half of the show, but still, I did it. I had the leading role in the school play! And, heres the best part, I actually think I did a pretty good job. Even Harmony said I was a natural up there. And that means something, since she almost never gives an acting compliment to anyone but herself and Jennifer Lawrence.
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That glowing feeling I was talking about earlier? Thats exactly what happened to me up there on stage. In those moments, singing and dancing and saying my lines, it was like the audience didnt matter. Of course, it was nice to have my friends, family, and director out there, but I wasnt thinking about how theyd react. I wasnt freaking out about messing up my lines or choreography. Actually, I wasnt thinking much about anything. I was just living. Just there, in the present moment, feeling so happy and connected to everyone on that stage.
Theres something about doing live theater that gives me such a rush. Its like everyones heartbeat aligns for this one moment, just leaving everything on that stage and giving all of ourselves. Its the best feeling in the world. Thats what Drake said. I told him it was close to it
If the onstage feeling isnt the best feeling in the world, then whats the best feeling? Well, I think I may have felt it just after the curtains closed and the audience left. Just me and Drake…looking deep into each others eyes…Drake telling me maybe he wasnt just acting after all…asking me to the Winter Formal…okay, now Im pinching myself again just to make sure this is actually my real life. Can you believe it?! Me, Rhyme, the lead in the play, reunited with the Chicken Girls, and going to the Winter Formal with the most perfect date in Attaway. If this is what high school is actually like, then let me stay there forever.
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Of course, everything isnt totally perfect. If I could have things the way I truly wanted, Id have Birdie back here, safe in Attaway and ready to rejoin the Chicken Girls in time for Winter Formal. Maybe Id have T.K. back here, too…or at least a text from him. Well, a girl can dream.
Id talk more about that – about everything – but Im onto another mission: finding a formal dress that I love and that Harmony thinks is worthy. Shes decided shes going to be my personal stylist from now on. Wish me luck!